Expectations

With so many expectations I feel so lost, subject to my conviction. I live for what has been set for me and wonder; could I really thrive this way? Must I fight for what I‘m told to be or do I fight for what I know is right?

I could thrive if only my life was mine. If only I could survive these expectations that bind. I‘ve lost control; I‘m dodging the unknown, being pulled by what I don’t know and running from what burns; this so-called redemption.

These strings don’t break. They burrow deep and become apart of me. Is this what I‘m supposed to be?

I could thrive if only I could break free, but how could this be if these expectations destroy me? I can‘t hide. I‘m tied to these lies. So how could I thrive if I cannot survive these expectations that bind?

I‘ve been through fires, waters, and then into the ice. Disasters strike right before my eyes. I fall into the strife, the fight for life, yet I can’t survive these expectations of mine. No more! It is as if I am not even alive. It is as if I‘ve never truly lived.

Have I lost that part of me that was once so bright? Have I lost the light that once gave me my strength and might? Where are the powers of passion and the will to strive and be alive? Shouldn’t these powers also be mine? Why are these choices not left for me to decide? If only these expectations would die. Then maybe I’d survive the tides of life or perhaps even destroy the darkness that blinds mankind.

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